April 10, 2013

A Masochist

When I'm feeling particularly masochistic, I will look at pictures of other people's wedding. I will hop onto Pinterest and look at all the dress/decoration/lovey ideas on there. And I will feel bad. Very very bad.

Let me tell you a secret.

I want to get  married.

Very, very badly.

I may be young, but I know what I want and I know what my instincts are telling me. But alas, the boy won't marry me. So for now I sit and stare at people who get to live with the person they love with all their heart every. single. day. And I will be sad.

I know I need to be happy now. I have a fantastic relationship and not very many responsibilities, so I can be happy. But that doesn't stop the heart-tearing feelings I get when I know it's not my turn and probably wont be for a very long time.

It breaks my heart every day.

So here I am today, a masochist.

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